


Words of Comfort

by arlathann



Category: Dragon Age (Video Games), Dragon Age - All Media Types, Dragon Age: Inquisition
Genre: F/M, Fluff, Hurt/Comfort, Pre-Relationship
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-18
Updated: 2020-01-18
Packaged: 2021-02-27 09:20:08
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,135
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22304809
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/arlathann/pseuds/arlathann
Summary: Meiri Lavellan has trouble figuring out her feelings after the turbulent events in Redcliffe. Solas helps, in more ways than he realizes.
Relationships: Female Lavellan/Solas
Comments: 2
Kudos: 15





	Words of Comfort

It’s been two days since the Herald and her companions returned from Redcliffe. The official mission report presented the incident with an almost casual simplicity - a Tevinter Magister and a member of the Venatori, Alexius, had been neutralized after conspiring with the Elder One. However, what really happened in Redcliffe that day could hardly be described as simple. Meiri could think of little else other than what she’s seen in the Redcliffe Castle. Countless meetings with the Inquisition’s advisors did not help put her mind at ease - on the contrary, they made her relive the situation over and over until her mind was filled with images she’d rather forget. Images that she never expected would affect her so deeply.

After surviving the Conclave explosion and closing her first rift, Lavellan did not have much time to ponder over her fate. She accepted the fact that she’s the only person who’s able to close the Breach and set her mind on the mission. She was too busy - or maybe that’s what she kept telling herself - to really consider the possibility of failing. However, seeing the world filled with chaos and destruction in the potential future made her realize just how dire their mission is, and how much depends on her alone. She could push those thoughts away no longer as the visions of her failure stayed fresh in her mind.

Wishing to be alone and try to process her thoughts, Meiri made her way to her cabin. She did not feel like talking to any of her new friends and acquaintances as the meeting she had just attended in the war room made her mentally exhausted. A nap sounded like a much better plan for the afternoon.

As she approached the hut, Lavellan found Solas sitting on the bench in front of his cabin. He appeared busy, poring over his notes, which almost made Meiri heave a sigh of relief. With luck, she’d be able pass him by quietly and find haven in her quarters without catching his attention.

Save from not wanting to socialize, there was another reason Meiri didn’t want to talk to Solas. Whether she wanted to admit it or not, she was avoiding the apostate eversince their trip back to Haven. The visions of the future Lavellan experienced were weighing on her heavily, but there was one detail she tried to, unsuccessfully, push out of her mind - seeing Solas die right in front of her. She tried to reason with herself, searching for a rational explanation for her reaction but with little success.

Even though she didn’t know him very long, Solas was the first person she befriended within her current company. He was the first elf she met since the Conclave so she found kinship in him, despite their very different backgrounds. Their mutual interests and the knowledge Solas was ready to share with her gave them reasons for many conversations - some more challenging than the others - and Meiri found herself fascinated by his stories. _His stories_ , she kept trying to tell herself, _not him_. Despite that, she enjoyed the flirtatious exchanges between them and was always looking forward to interacting with him. Lavellan came to accept the fact she might have liked him a little bit more than she’d let on. Just a stupid, childish crush born out of curiosity and fascination that would pass soon enough. Or so she thought…

Still, Solas was her friend and that alone was a plausible reason for her reaction. Who wouldn’t feel miserable after seeing their friend die? But no, it wasn’t a sufficient explanation. Meiri grew to like Sera in the very short time of their acquaintance and she wouldn’t hesitate to call the archer her friend. Why did seeing her die feel different then? The only reason for Solas’ death affecting her so much is one she did not want to accept. And so, she decided to avoid the elf until her mind starts feeling a bit less hazy and she can realize that whatever confusing feelings she felt were nothing to be concerned with.

Lavellan was two steps away from her quarters. Satisfied with herself for successfully sneaking past the apostate, she reached for the doorknob, when suddenly she heard Solas clearing his throat.

“Lethallan?” The sound of Solas’ voice startled her more than it should have.

_Shit._

Meiri tried to collect herself before turning around, hiding any traces of nervousness from her face. The apostate was now standing, his notes forgotten on the bench behind him.

“Solas?” she replied, her voice probably just a tad higher than usual.

“Are you alright? We haven’t had the chance to talk since Redcliffe,” said Solas, curiosity and slight concern written on his face.

“Uh... Yeah, I’m alright. It’s just...” Meiri trailed off, not sure where she was going with that. “I’m fine,” she repeated, with more feigned confidence this time.

Solas did not seem to believe her and assessed her, his eyes narrowing slightly.

“Walk with me?” He said after a short pause. It sounded more like a request than a question.

After just a short moment of considering her options - one of them being running into her quarters and locking the door - Meiri smiled nervously and took a step forward.

“Alright.”

* * *

They left Haven’s walls walking in silence. Meiri knew Solas must have noticed she’s been acting strange and the longer the silence continued, the less confident she felt. She couldn’t stand the quiet for much longer and let out an exaggerated sigh.

“Go on, ask,” said Meiri, keeping her eyes on the path in front of her.

“Pardon me?”

“I know you want to hear what happened in Redcliffe. So go on, ask whatever you want to know,” she said, looking at the elf expectantly.

Solas’ expression changed from slight confusion into something softer.

“I admit, I am curious about the details of the incident and I’d love to hear them if you wished to discuss it. But this is not the reason I wanted to talk to you.”

“Oh?” Was the only thing Lavellan could say as her mind spiraled into multiple different directions at once.

“I can see something troubles you since leaving Redcliffe. You do not have to tell me what happened, but you could if you’d like to talk about it, lethallan,” he offered, with a hint of an encouraging smile.

_Here we go..._

Meiri considered telling Solas she doesn’t want to talk about what happened but before she managed to say a word, she realized that maybe talking about what’s bothering her - _well, not the whole thing..._ \- might help. She did always respect his opinions and their conversations always seemed to give her a new perspective.

Meiri slowed her pace almost to a halt and rubbed her face with her right palm as she sighed.

“How much did you hear about what happened?”

“Just that you were sent to the future and came back victorious,” Solas replied, sounding mildly impressed.

“That’s true, although terribly simplified.”

“You are certain you experienced time travel? Could it have been an illusion, a trick of the Fade?”

“I’m a mage. I’d know.” Meiri tried not to sound irritated; she started to become frustrated at the extent of her nervousness.

“Of course. Please, continue.”

Meiri took a deep breath, the cold air stinging like tiny needles in her throat.

“Alexius used a spell to send Dorian and I to the future. It wasn’t any kind of magic I’m familiar with but I am certain it was real.” She took a short pause to collect her thoughts. “What we saw there was complete chaos - so much death and destruction. With my absence - or rather, the absence of the anchor - the Inquisition failed. I failed.” Lavellan noticed they had stopped walking.

“It wasn’t until then that I realized just how much is at stake - how much responsibility has been thrusted upon me,” she looked at him with pleading eyes, silently asking for some kind of reassurance. She didn’t tell about her worries to anyone else, not wanting to appear weak in front of all the people who depended on her. But with Solas, it was different. She felt like she could tell him anything and not be afraid of being judged or pitied.

Solas nodded, seemingly in understanding. When he finally spoke, he put his hand on Meiri’s shoulder. The touch felt electric, almost burning. Solas and Lavellan had not shared any physical contact aside from his studies of the anchor or helping with each other’s wounds after battle. While Meiri was accustomed to casual touch between friends - a hand on the back here or a squeeze of the shoulder there - it did not seem to be the case with the other elf, so the contact between them seemed all the more unusual and surprising, and not at all unwelcome. It did not help Meiri’s already confusing feelings.

“I can see how this kind of pressure must weigh on you, and you are certainly allowed to feel overwhelmed. However, you don’t have to carry this burden alone. We’ve gathered a fine team of people ready to lend you their weapons and their support,” he said as he withdrew his hand from Lavellan’s shoulder. She immediately started missing the heat and tried not to look disappointed at the loss of his touch. Overwhelmed by his statement, or maybe emboldened by its implications, Meiri sighed as she looked at the ground.

“There’s also another matter,” she began, her eyes moving back up to look at Solas just to find him looking at her patiently. “Back in Alexius’ future, it wasn’t just me and Dorian. You, Sera, and Leliana were also there.” Unsure of how to continue, Meiri bit the inside of her cheek lightly. “You and Sera were ill, corrupted by red lyrium. Leliana... I barely recognized her. She went through hell and it showed.”

She took a small pause to consider just how to phrase what she was about to say.

“When we finally defeated Alexius, we didn’t have much time to figure out how to undo the time travel spell. A horde of demons was pounding at the door and it wouldn’t stay out for much longer. The three of you decided to keep the demons away so Dorian and I can try to escape and undo this mess,” she said right before taking in a shuddering breath, bracing herself to finally voice what has been haunting her for days.

“The demons poured in and you stalled them long enough for Dorian to undo the spell. But not before I saw all three of you give your lives to ensure we succeed.”

The next sentence came out from Lavellan’s mouth as barely more than a wavering whisper.

“I saw you _die_ , Solas.”

Slight surprise and a shadow of something Meiri couldn’t place passed over the apostate’s features as he looked away, staring at something in the distance with unseeing eyes. She wasn’t sure whether the news of his own sacrifice was the cause of his reaction, or if he picked out the unspoken confession hidden in her words.

Not a moment has passed when Solas’ expression relaxed and Meiri let out the breath she hadn’t realized she was holding. When he finally spoke, his voice sounded more gentle than before.

“I see... I’m sorry that was something you had to witness. For what it’s worth, our faith in you hadn’t been misplaced.”

“And what if it had? What if we won’t be so fortunate in the future?” came Meiri’s quiet response.

“We are here now, are we not? On my part, I can promise I’ll do my best not to die,” said Solas more cheerfully than the occasion called for, no doubt to dissolve the tension.

Meiri chuckled, seemingly satisfied with Solas’ response.

“Please do.”

Solas must have noticed the other elf’s slight shivering as he suggested. “Shall we head back inside? We wouldn’t want our Herald to catch a cold,” he added playfully.

Meiri suppressed an exasperated groan as she unsuccessfully tried to hide her mirth.

“Don’t call me that. But yes.” She started walking back towards the village, her heart lighter and her head calmer than they had been in a while. After a short pause, she added, “I think I’ll head to the tavern, grab a glass of spiced wine. Care to join me?”

The offer was more of a pleasantry than anything else as Lavellan didn’t expect him to accept it. She had never seen Solas in the tavern before - she guessed he preferred solitude to the noise or maybe Sera’s company was not something he wished to endure - so his response came as a pleasant surprise.

“I’d like to.”

Meiri’s only reply was a radiant smile as she tried to ignore the butterflies fluttering in her stomach.


End file.
